Introduction
This essay explores the phenomenon of romantic aesthetics on social media platforms such as TikTok and Instagram, focusing on how these spaces cultivate a performance of ‘soft identity’ through femininity and nostalgia. It examines softness as both a visual and emotional performance, requiring time, products, and labour, and how emotional authenticity is transformed into a form of visual discipline. Drawing on the concept of ‘confidence culture’ by Orgad and Gill (2022), the discussion will address self-management and the commodification of identity within these digital environments. The essay aims to unpack the intersection of aesthetic presentation, gendered expectations, and cultural nostalgia, while critiquing the broader implications of such trends within the fashion and digital culture spheres.
Softness as Performance and Consumption
On platforms like TikTok and Instagram, softness is often performed through curated imagery and short-form content featuring pastel palettes, vintage clothing, and delicate accessories. This aesthetic, frequently associated with hyper-femininity, requires significant investment in time, products, and labour. For instance, users may spend hours crafting the perfect ‘soft girl’ look, involving specific makeup techniques, wardrobe choices, and even staged domestic settings evoking a nostalgic, romanticised past. This aligns with Orgad and Gill’s (2022) notion of ‘confidence culture,’ where individuals are encouraged to manage and present themselves in ways that conform to idealised, often gendered, standards. The labour behind this performance is largely invisible, masked by the polished final product shared online, reinforcing a culture of consumption where specific brands and products become essential to achieving this ‘soft’ identity.
Emotional Authenticity as Visual Discipline
The performance of softness extends beyond mere aesthetics to encompass emotional authenticity, which is disciplined into a highly visual form. TikTok and Instagram users often narrate personal stories or vulnerabilities through a romanticised lens—think whimsical captions or melancholic montages set to vintage music. However, as Orgad and Gill (2022) argue, this display of authenticity is less about genuine emotional expression and more about aligning with cultural expectations of how femininity should be performed. Soft identity becomes a disciplined act, where emotional depth is curated to fit aesthetic norms, arguably reducing complex human experiences to consumable content. This visual discipline not only shapes individual self-presentation but also perpetuates a cycle where users feel compelled to conform to these ideals to gain social validation.
Femininity and Nostalgia in Romantic Aesthetics
Central to the romantic aesthetic on social media is the interplay of femininity and nostalgia. The ‘soft girl’ trope often draws on idealised visions of historical femininity—think Victorian lace or 1950s domesticity—repackaged for modern audiences. This nostalgia serves a dual purpose: it evokes a comforting, simplified past while reinforcing traditional gender roles through visual cues like floral dresses or dainty mannerisms. Yet, as critics might argue, this romanticisation can obscure the restrictive realities of those historical contexts for women. Furthermore, the trend highlights a generational longing for perceived authenticity, contrasting with the fast-paced, often alienating nature of contemporary digital life. Indeed, platforms like TikTok amplify this nostalgia through algorithms that prioritise content resonating with collective cultural memory.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the romantic aesthetics on TikTok and Instagram reveal how softness operates as both performance and consumption, heavily reliant on time, products, and labour. Emotional authenticity is transformed into visual discipline, shaped by confidence culture and self-management, as discussed by Orgad and Gill (2022). The interplay of femininity and nostalgia further complicates this trend, blending idealised pasts with modern gendered expectations. This phenomenon raises critical questions about the commodification of identity and the pressures of digital self-presentation within fashion and cultural spheres. Ultimately, while these aesthetics offer creative expression, they also reflect broader societal demands to conform to curated ideals, suggesting a need for deeper scrutiny of digital identity performance and its implications for personal and cultural authenticity.
References
- Orgad, S. and Gill, R. (2022) Confidence Culture. Duke University Press.
